The Single Adjustment That Made a Difference: How I Overcame After-Work Stress Through an Unexpected Discovery in the Loft

One frequently become like a coiled spring once the workday ends. Tension grips my shoulders, breathing becomes rapid and shallow. Typically, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut used to lead to the pop of a cork from a wine bottle, wine poured quickly into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Then, several months back, I discovered my now-adult son’s old school recorder in the attic. Curious, I blew into it, instantly reminded of the time when it drove me crazy – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the sharp sounds echoing in my mind long after he slept.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I took it down, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I had no musical talent whatsoever. I took recorder classes in primary school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I watched dozens of YouTube videos aimed at children, and printed out a fingering chart. Looking up simple recorder songs, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, a typical young child could learn it quickly, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son asked what the hell I was doing (and begged me to quit), but I persevered – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. My inability to remember anything forced me to focus on the music sheet, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breath calmed, my attention sharpened, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.

Now, after some months, I can handle other children’s songs and a decent Ode to Joy. Yes, my timing is rubbish, and I must jot down note names, but for me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it is simply about the pleasure it brings and how it clears my mind while playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which probably relieves parents, yet it made me wistful for my school years, as well as my son’s.

I try to pick up my recorder every evening after work before I do anything else, and in those 20 or so minutes, I escape into my own realm. Afterward, I feel totally energised and uplifted.

My friends think it’s hilarious, yet a therapist friend informed me I was not only lowering my stress levels, and boosting mental skills, like memory and sound processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.